REDUCE YOUR AUTOMATIC NEGATIVE THOUGHTS AND INCREASE YOUR POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS

Your ANTs [Automatic negative Thoughts] are comments like ‘I cannot communicate’, ‘They do not like me’ or ‘They think it is my fault’.

In order to nullify ANT’s try and identify the situations in which they occur.  Your automatic negative thoughts may trigger deeper negative emotions or counter-productive behaviour.  These in turn could set off further negative thoughts.

As your ANT’s have probably been recurring for a long period of time, and are therefore deep rooted, it would be easier to manage them than to try and put an end to them.  Do not expect them to disappear overnight.  It is possible to manage them.  They might re-occur from time to time, but you can prevent them from taking you into that negative territory.

Observe your Automatic Negative Thoughts objectively.  Recognise them and the situations in which they occur.

If you can recognise the situation, you should be able to recognise the ‘approach’ to those situations.  By recognising that inner voice you can prevent the slide into negativity.  Recognise that the process has begun, turn and walk away and cut off the thought immediately.  Do this literally if you have to. Distance yourself from the thought.  Another way is to calmly ‘let it go’; do not pay any more attention to it. Return your focus to the task at hand.

Meditation is a great destroyer of Automatic Negative Thoughts.  Through meditation you recognise the ANT’s, and you recognise the stages in which the ANT’s present themselves.  You are therefore able to alienate yourself from the ANT’s as they start to occur.  Many meditative techniques are focused on ‘Impartial Observation’ of thoughts, as it is called.

A friend of mine, wears a rubber band around her wrist watch strap, and whenever an ANT begins to emerge she plucks the rubber band against her wrist strap.

We can use short positive statements to challenge ANT’s, to be replaced by self-nurturing beliefs.  These are commonly called affirmations.  Simply put, it is a kind of self-brainwashing, to wash away your chosen negative thoughts.

Every thought you think and every word you say is an affirmation.  It is said that 90% of those thoughts are negative!

Using positive affirmation statements will help to keep us focused on our goals and remind us to think consciously about our words and thoughts.

Affirmations are used extensively in self help programmes.

Positive affirmations are designed to challenge negative beliefs and thoughts and halt the flow that confirms them.  They are a process of becoming aware of your daily thoughts and words and redirecting your ANT’s into a positive and happier design.  The more you consciously insert the affirmations into your daily thoughts and words, the quicker they will work for you.

Write a few positive statements.  They must be positive and in the present tense.  Focus on what you want, not on what you don’t want.

Example: If I want to be happy and successful in my job. The affirmation might look like this: “I have a fantastic job and it makes me feel successful.”

If there is a problem in your past life that makes you feel insecure in certain situations.

The affirmation may be, “I am ready and willing to release the past. Now!”

Some people use affirmation ‘post it’s’ (those little yellow note-it pads).  Write your affirmations on some of those and place them where you will see them; on the fridge door, or on your dressing mirror.  When you see the post-it – do not ignore it but read the contents to yourself.

Another way is to quote your affirmations to yourself whilst looking at yourself in the mirror.  By looking directly at yourself in the eye, in the mirror and saying the affirmation, you will be magnifying the importance of the message to yourself.

I have had people sing and chant affirmations!  You’re welcome to try this, but choose your time, not in the bus!

Repeat your affirmations with passion, believe in your statement.  They will be more effective in this manner.

Examples of Automatic Negative Thoughts

• Over Generalisation – ‘I never get things right’; ‘They are always teasing me’; ‘I will never get there on time.’
• All or Nothing – Viewing things in the extreme.  Right or wrong, good or bad.
• Personalising – blaming yourself for something that has nothing to do with you.
• Exaggeration – Making things seem worse than they really are.
• Mind reading – Assuming other people’s thoughts before they discuss them.
• Fortune telling – It’s never worked before therefore why should it work this time.
• Emotional reasoning – ‘I feel incapable therefore I am incapable’; ‘I feel fat therefore I am fat’.
• Filtering – Focusing on the negatives and ignoring the positives.

Examples of Affirmations

• Health – ‘Every cell in my body vibrates with energy and health.’
• Success – ‘I succeed in everything I do.’
• Romance –‘I attract happy and meaningful relationships.’
• Weight loss – ‘I am the ideal weight for me.’
• Self esteem – ‘I am my own unique self, special, creative and wonderful.’
• Peace – ‘I am at peace with myself.’

Argue with Yourself

• Ask your Ant for Evidence – ‘What is my objective evidence?’
• Ask if the ANT is an exaggeration – ‘Am I over reacting or over generalising?’
• Alternatives – ‘Are there other explanations?’
• Empowering – ‘Is this ANT empowering or counter-productive?’
• Reversed Roles – ‘How would I evaluate other people who performed as I did?’

By ROB LINDEGGER

Member of COMENSA (Coaching and mentoring Association of South Africa),  The International Mentoring Association ECI (European Coaching Institute).

Rob’s work is focused on life coaching, stress coaching, redundancy & career, self-motivation, self-development and retirement coaching. He also holds private retreats in the Southern Drakensberg.

Web address: www.impactcoaching.co.za
Email address: grow@impactcoaching.co.za
Cell: 082 920 4827
Fax: 086 668 0517